Update to last post

Well we found out we won't be getting the three brothers because they dont want to move them as far away as they would have to if they moved with us. But we are still planning on going though with the foster care process and continue with respite care!

Foster Parents

Well these past few weeks have been pretty crazy at my house. We maybe taking in 3 foster brothers and this will be the first time we will have foster kids. We do respite but it is a bit different. Respite we only take care of for a weekend or maybe a week but with foster kids we will be responsible for everything and everyday! We are as ready as we can be but i am still a little nervous! I know these boys will be scared and i will do my best to help ease their minds but they have had such a hard life already it might be a little hard to ease their minds! They have been let down in every way possible. Also foster care doesn't mean permanent so if they get to go back to their mother i am hoping that she betters herself and doesn't let them down again. Because if she lets them down again i will fell like i have let them down also! But don't get me wrong i am so great full that we will hopefully get to be a part in these boys lives and hopefully be someone that they can rely one and trust! This kind of leads me to thoughts of all the kids out there that get tossed around from one place to another or the kids that are stuck in neglectful homes and never get help. I fell so bad for these kids! Some of them have their spirits broken before they even find out who they are. There are kids that have fetal alcohol syndrome and some that are hooked on drugs when they are born because their mom did drugs when she was pregnant. I just can't imagine how people can do this to such innocent little kids. These are things i know happen but really do they need to!? I was never around any of this at least that i knew of when i was little so moving up here and taking in respite kids has really opened my eyes! As much as I want to have children of my own and i plan on having them someday hopefully soon, i think right now helping any kids i can is a job that i need to do. Seeing where these kids come from helps me not stress about stuff that really isn't that important! I couldn't imagine not know where my parents are or not being able to call them on the phone just to say hi. I can't comprehend not liking my parents or not even wanting to see them again. Don't get me wrong though some of these kids really do want to see their parents and love them so much they don't really care what they did to them. Also their are the kids that have done something wrong and that's why they are in foster care but my thought it is why weren't the parents their to somewhat guild them!
On the happier side of all of that you have the foster parents that really care about these kids and are helping them become better people or at least pulling that better person out of them. We have had an opportunity to work and get to know some of these people and they are wonderful. There are bad foster parents out there but we haven't met any yet! The ones we work with really take the time to get to know the children and the little things about them because you really can't treat any of them the same because they have all come from different places.
So in all i hope that we get the chance to be foster parents to these boys and hope that someday i can look back and say that i am glad i did this and i really did make a positive difference in so many kids lives.

Ches. Gymnastics

This week my niece has been showing me a lot of her gymnastic moves! She is seven yrs old and has been doing gymnastics since she was about 2 or 3. But these last couple of weeks she has been vastly improving and with the improvement has come being more daring. In the past week she has almost perfected a back hand spring (which I had always known to be a back flip flop :)) She has also become daring enough to do a back walkover. I really don't know a lot about the little things in gymnastics but I do know a little and it just amazes me how much she has improved in such a short time. I suppose I shouldn't be to surprised though she does work out in a gym for 3 nights 3 hours each. She has even gotten to do her first competition this year. She traveled to Chicago, Twin Cities and Des Moines. It is also fun that no matter where she is it becomes her gym! She does flips on the trampoline (when its warm enough), flips around her swing set, flips on her bed and at her brothers wrestling when they are all done wresting the mats are hers. She even scares her gym teachers when they get to put down mats to tumble on. Not only has gymnastics helped her coordination but it has also helped her socially. She has become more willing to talk and just go play with other kids. She has even gotten to have her first sleep over with a friend that wasn't part of her mom's daycare (which are kids that she has pretty much grown up with). The friend was a part of her gymnastics group that she traveled with and stayed at the same hotels as when she went to competitions. Gymnastics has been such a great thing for my niece! Which confirms my thinking that it is really good for kids to get involved in activities no matter what it is either sports, girl scouts or anything else. In my experiences either myself or my nieces and nephew it has always been sports. I think sports is a great thing. It teaches kids things like team work and good sportsmanship. These qualities can care over into adulthood not only in sports but in careers. It also helps with there social skills, quick thinking and coordination. Back to Chesny, it makes me so proud to watch her develop and grow not only as a gymnast but as a young person too! I am looking forward to watching her compete more as she grows. Also I'm looking forward to seeing her perfect more and more difficult skills that I wish I could do but will never be able to do!:)

Past and Present

This past weekend my husband had his high school basketball alumni tournament and it was kind of exciting for me to go back also. My husband and I both when to the same school and graduated the same year so I know a lot of the people also. Not only did I go to school there but my sister who is eight years older also went there so I know a lot of the people in the generations ahead of me. Anyway while sitting and watching some of the games my friend and I got to talking about the difference in the people that graduated ahead of us and those that graduated behind us. The ones that were ahead of us don’t really seem to change much and we figure that is because they look older when we are younger. And those who are younger than us seem to change a lot because they looked so young to us and now they are all grown up. To me it’s more than just a basketball tournament it’s a way to reconnect with friends that you haven’t seen since the previous year and some that you haven’t seen in many years. Our school was two different schools that consolidated into one and this year they decided to invite people from all three schools instead of two. The two original schools were rivals back when I was younger and my sister was going to one of the schools. So this year we did get to see some people that we haven’t see in such a long time. A couple of the guys were guys that when I was about 10 yrs old would play basketball with me just about every day. They taught me all the little things about basketball. It was really nice to get to see people that had helped me in different parts of my life. It was also nice to catch up with these people and see where they are and how they are doing now. It’s also funny how when some of the guys get around old friends they seem to act a little more like high school guys again and how old nick names come back. For example my husband was always known as Coleman (Coleman was his last name) but now that we are married he has changed his last name to my last name and so I just find it funny that no matter how long you are out of high school that part of your life need ends! I can’t wait till next year’s tournament to see how everyone changes and hopefully see more people that I haven’t seen in a while.

Adoption and our family!

The picture above is a picure that our 1st respite child made us and it is one of the best pictures I have ever gotten. It still and always will always be on our fridge and in our hearts!
Adoption! This has been a big topic of discussion around our house lately. We have actually had to two chance to adopt some great kids. About a month ago we had the chance to adopt a two year old boy but they found a family that was already foster parents which we would have had to become in order to take him before we could adopt. And now just this week we had the chance to adopt a sibling group of three, two girls and their little brother. Although we really would have like to have taken them in we just don't have enough rooms in our house. We only have two bedrooms and would need at least three. It do make me a little sad that we couldn't add these children to our family and give them a SAFE and LOVING home. My hope is that they find a safe, loving home that is large enough for them to have some space they can call their own. We are not discarding the idea of adoption though. We are going to be starting foster care as soon as we finish all the requirements. Our first objective as foster parents will be to help return the children home to their biological parents when the parents can provide a safe and somewhat calming home but for those children that can not return home we are not closing out the option to adopt these children. Although we would love to adopt a pink baby ( these means a baby that as soon as its born it is your child the mother has not option to change her mind--this is what some of the people I know in the social work field call that type of adoption) we don't now if we are able to have children of our own yet so we think our time is better spent with children that really need a safe place to call home while things are getting settled at there birth parents home. So I can't wait until we are able to become foster parents and get to know all the great kids we will have a chance to leave lasting memories with. We are already doing respite care and love all of the children we have had though there but they are all very different children. Some you have to step back and say we may need to change our way of doing things with this child but it all needs up good. We love having these boys in our house they keep us busy and allow us to do a lot of fun stuff that we may not normally do just the two of us. We play games all the time, we get to go the the park (when its not freezing) and we have gotten to go sledding a few times which is something I haven't done in a long time! Something I have also found a little surprising is that some of our teenage boys love to help us clean and cook! One of the boys it doesn't matter what I'm doing from cooking, to cleaning, to carving pumpkins, he just loves to help. Even though you can clearly tell he is ADHD when he is helping me you wouldn't be able to tell. I am very much enjoying getting to know all of the boys different personalities and I'm excited to get to know so many more children. This is such an amazing experience that I would never give up for anything. Someday I hope we can add our own biological children and any of our adopted children to our family. Children are so amazing I think they can teach adults a lot about life and help them not forget the little treasures in life.